Why You Need Lingerie in Your Life (Even When You’re in Your 40s)

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Some of us are lucky and start to feel more powerful as we age.

Some of us aren’t, and things just kind of cool and diminish in the bedroom. Sometimes it is literally just the stage of life/work/kids/health – and 99% of the time, it’s (mostly) in our heads. We’re not communicating with our partner in a way that feels fulfilling, or we’re distracted by the constant pull of work, kids, the economy, politics, or what the hell we’re going to make for dinner…You get it. 

Listen, the benefit of this age is that at this point in our lives, most of us know what we’ve got (physically speaking), and we know what we like, both when it comes to clothing and when it comes to our turn-ons. But ask yourself this: When was the last time you put on something that made you feel hot? Like actually made YOU go: “Oh. Heeellllooo, ladies, and gentlemen. I have arrived.” 

There’s this false idea that in order to feel hot, we have to conform to some outside idea of what makes us sensual and powerful. Society tells us we have to have perkier boobs, a smaller waist, a shapely butt, no wrinkles, and be ready to go at it like rabbits the moment our partners are. 

But what if feeling sexy was really about tapping into your own turn-ons? What if you put something on for yourself instead of dressing for others? What if you chose to approach it from the perspective of your own pleasure instead of someone else’s? What would that even look like?

There’s a hack for getting in the mood, and it can be distilled down to just seven simple words. 

You’ll have to check out my story on The Candidly to find out what those seven simple words are, however.

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Abigail Bassett is a full-time freelance journalist, content creator, and television, video, and podcast host whose work has appeared in publications like TechCrunch, Fast Company, Inc. Magazine, Forbes, Fortune, Motor Trend, Shondaland, Money Magazine, and on CNN. Her passion is telling unique stories that change the way we see, interact with, and relate to the world. She is also a Yoga Alliance Registered 500-hour yoga teacher.

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